“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.” ~ Nelson Mandela
In just a few days we celebrate the 4th of July – better known as America’s Independence Day. I thought I would share with you something many of my clients have challenges with – Independence. What this means and how we can celebrate our independence regardless of our nationality religion, sex, race, or gender, is the subject of this letter.
For many, independence comes naturally, where others struggle even cringe thinking about it. So I ask you – What does independence mean to you? Does being independent mean you can manage and care for your own needs without the help of another person or source? Maybe.
People are unable to be independent for a variety of reasons, with fear at the forefront: the fear of being alone, the fear of rejection and the fear of the future. Some put their happiness in the hands of a significant other, thinking this will bring them fulfillment. Yet, having the ability to be happy regardless of being in a relationship or not is an amazing attribute.
At the end of the day, you only have yourself to fall back on, so it is exceedingly important to be able to handle things on your own. It is all about being secure with who you are and what you believe in.
It is extremely empowering to know that you are in control of your own life and your own choices. It is much more beneficial to listen to the voice inside yourself rather than the judgmental opinions of others. There are some who are afraid to think of being alone or for themselves because that involves taking responsibility for their own lives.
The most ideal scenario is someone who is independent and chooses to be in a loving relationship where both enhance one another and their lives together.
Here is what others say about being independent:
- being independent means you feel good about yourself without other people’s opinion or company;
- being the author of your life, true independence derives from self-love;
- being self-sufficient, able to set own schedule and choices, etc.;
- being in a position to help others out (not just with money but skills, experience and knowledge);
- being able to participate in building a healthy community;
- being able to stand up for yourself, even when your boundaries are being disrespected;
- being independent is the opposite of feeling afraid or lonely.
Now if you, or someone you know, can benefit from my work in helping them raise their self-esteem, confidence and let go of fears and anxieties due to any reason, call me. I am here for you.
In closing, Fourth of July and fireworks will always make you pretty nostalgic (even down to the BBQ parties, the ice cream and all the selfies you’ll be taking). Knowing all sparkles do eventually fizzle out, let your self-worth and independence shine your light even brighter. Be the sparkle!
Evoke what was, Embrace what is, Evolve to what will be – YOU MATTER.