How do you FEEL LOVE. Most of your life you strive to feel valued and whole. Life is about this journey: a journey of self discovery – to learn and experience the most important and instinctive feeling called ‘Love‘. Millions will celebrate and profess their love this Valentine’s Day.
By now you have realized feelings and emotions don’t come in neat little boxes. They are often blend of a lot of different things you experience. When you feel happy, most things feel good. When feeling down, then expressing your love can be tinged with sadness. At any given moment, you feel varying shades of multiple emotions of love. From the moment of birth, it is the love of mother, parents, grandparents, family, friends, pets, nature, and so on.
If you think of the description of emotions like of the weather, you know there are different kinds of cloudy days. There are really dark, cloudy days; there are bright, cloudy days; and there are cloudy days where the sun breaks through and you see the light shine upon your face – and you sing “Come Rain or Come Shine!”
How you feel loved can be as simple as 1-2-3.
When you are in a relationship there are three things that tell you if someone feels love for you. If you feel out of touch and your partners attempts to express or show you love aren’t working so well, its time you figure out why the initial fire is not as hot, but more importantly which of these three things you prefer – you need to work on how you feel loved before you can express love.
VISUAL LOVE STRATEGY
Visual – taken places, gift you things, do something special
People who enjoy being taken places, bought things and looked at with that special look in order to know they are totally loved are have a visual love strategy. They enjoy gifts (flowers, chocolate, perfume, etc) and being taken on holiday, for a day out, and going out for dinner in a beautiful restaurant. They feel love when their partner looks at them that certain way.
AUDITORY LOVE STRATEGY
Auditory – special tone of voice or special words
People who have an auditory love strategy connect with the tone of voice and the special words their partners say to them. Not only do they need to hear ‘I love you’ quite often if not daily, but they love that tone of voice that makes them weak at the knees.
KINESTHETIC LOVE STRATEGY
Kinesthetic – touched in a certain way or a certain place
People who have a kinesthetic love strategy are all about being hugged or touch. It is the contact of skin on skin, holding hands, an arm around them, spooning at night, or a hug while they cook as well as full-blown kissing.
Do you know how you feel loved? Do you know how your lover feels loved by you?
Ask your loved one: “How do you feel loved by me”? If they automatically say yes – find out how they FEEL loved by you. Is it what you say, how you show, or how you do things for them. Do not be surprised if they are not aware of how they feel at first. They may also feel odd to share, not because of you, but perhaps they too had never thought of how they feel loved. Do You? This exercise may not be easy, yet profound for your relationship.
In C.S. Lewis’ book, The Four Loves, he says there are four basic kinds of love. He gives them their Greek names: agape—the God-like self-giving love even toward enemies; philia—the love of friendship and camaraderie; eros—the love of romance and desire and sexual attraction; and storge—the love of affection that arises through natural attachment, a child, a dog, a favorite old shabby sweater, a spot in the woods.
In closing, Open YOUR heart to attract love and commit to loving fully. Loving God, loving Yourself and loving others. I am committed to helping you Evoke Your Passion, Embrace Your Femininity and Strength, and Evolve to what can be – Your Matter!
If this was beneficial to you, I’d love to hear from you – drop me a line and share your thoughts!